When navigating the wild world of vocational discernment, there seem to be two prevailing strategies. One approach is to keep a meticulous

regimen: swiping between dating apps and convent contact pages with disciplined rigor until God’s plan becomes plain. The other is to sit back and prayerfully wait for the stars to align. If you’re discerning, odds are you’ve oscillated between the two, depending on your energy level—and maybe how that last date went.

Regardless of your approach, you can rest in the knowledge that your fundamental vocation is to “show forth the image of God and to be transformed into the image of the Father’s only Son” (CCC 1877). Discovering your vocation is not just a dream to be achieved, nor is it a life that will be handed to you. It is the daily affair of allowing your heart to be drawn and molded into Christ’s heart. So, whether you think you may eventually be called to conform yourself to Christ as a spouse or as his spouse, you can begin today, in ways small and large, preparing for that future.

A great first step in imaging Christ is to follow in His mother’s footsteps. Mary received and beheld Jesus in her own body, and you, too, can receive and behold Him in the Eucharist. While in Adoration, ask for His heartbeat to animate and organize your life; for His cares to become your own. Perhaps commit to a midnight holy hour to prepare you for the day when you are called to behold Christ in a person in need or in a restless infant. Through the Eucharist, you can be formed in the way of love so that you too may become nourishment for others—as Mary was for Jesus and as Jesus is for us.

As a further step, we do well to guard against the temptation to allow our spirituality to be defined only by comforts and consolations. When Mary was pregnant, she did not remain in the comfort of her home. Rather, she journeyed to take care of her cousin Elizabeth. Let us follow this example, making a Eucharistic gift of our lives through works of mercy and by discovering Christ’s face in those living beyond our socioeconomic boundaries.

Discernment can be difficult. Being uncertain of your vocational call can be isolating. It is a grace, then, that we need not walk this path alone. We can find friends in the Church’s female saints, who often traveled unexpected vocational paths. Learning about their lives and asking for their intercession can help you discern your own vocation. For examples of perseverance, read the martyrdom of Saints Perpetua and Felicity. Or, encounter the tender heart of Catherine of Siena in Sigrid Undset’s biography of her life. Find in the letters of Saint Zélie Martin the witness of a woman who adored her family, was bold in her faith, and ran a business. The list goes on.

The path ahead may be uncertain, and pursuing your vocation will likely carry risks, for to follow the way of Mary and Jesus is to follow the way of the Cross. Hold fast, however, to the promise of the Cross, knowing you are in good company, and it is a worthwhile endeavor. In Jesus Christ, and indeed in every saint, we find a testament to the reality that even under the heaviest of crosses, the joy of eternal love is found.

This article appeared in the May 2025 edition of The Catholic Telegraph Magazine. For your complimentary subscription, click here.